Volunteer Observers

During the six months of documentation for Guinness, several observation sessions are highlighted in my memory because they were rather extraordinary. At one session in May, the observer was having great difficulty hearing Puck. She said so repeatedly, and was growing very frustrated. At one point, she actually told Puck “Please slow down. You talk too fast.” Hearing this, he hopped off her finger and onto the table, looked up at her quizzically, and asked, “What’s wrong, stupid?” I corrected his impertinence, chiding him that this lady wasn’t stupid. At any rate, the observer at least heard that one statement and was rather bemused!

Puck had become sexually active that spring for the first time in his four years of life - - very late development for a parakeet. I joked that earlier in his life all available energy had been used up by his brain! Not having a mate, he gravitated towards human fingers and toes. During this process he somehow associated the word “touchy” with the mating act. Invariably he said “touchy, touchy, touchy” during his intimacy with a human appendage. Of course, during these amorous periods he expressed other appropriate comments, such as occurred on May 19^th, 1993 when I sat in with three observers. Bonnie Cromwell was one of them, and Puck was especially friendly with her, both because she had great rapport with animals and because she had observed him a month earlier. He did his touchy routine with one of her fingers, and after he had completed his “mating,” he looked up at Bonnie and said “You’re gonna be a mommy.” We all sat for a few seconds in stunned silence, and then broke out in hysterical laughter. This creature was unbelievable! I had read that there were native cultures that didn’t associate the mating act with procreation, and this bird could?

Another strange episode occurred on June 15^th when Puck flew down to an observer’s bare toes (she was wearing sandals), acknowledged them with the words “pretty toes,” proceeded to do his courtship dance, and while mating with the big toe uttered “We’re talking sex. I mean turn it up, shake your body!” I wasn’t present for this particular scene but the observer related it for the Guinness folks, and afterwards marveled with me over this bird’s intelligence.

An attempted observation that same month was notable for quality but not quantity of verbiage. I was trying to schedule the observations around some remodeling of my house. These attempts at providing a quiet environment did not work out one day, when a contractor was busy hammering right outside the kitchen where the cage was located. The observer was waiting for Puck to talk but he wouldn’t cooperate. I eventually brought him into the living room where it was less noisy. After a few minutes, his first words were “Get rid of person.” Since Puck knew and liked the observer, who had completed a prior session with Puck, we both knew that he was referring to the contractor. I surmised that he was upset by the building commotion, as well as the fact that two men had been ignoring him for several days. By that time Puck was accustomed to receiving lots of attention from strangers! Puck grudgingly uttered a few more words in the next 15 minutes or so, before stating, “Don’t like this!” We then knew that it was time to close shop for the day.

I might mention that all of the kind volunteers, who listened to Puck for Guinness between April and September 1993, heard 384 words that I had never noted! I, of course, added these words to my cumulative count.